I have been doing lots of walking lately as I step into my unbusy life. I walk without any fear through all the familiar back tracks and memory walks of home. From cliff walks or along the river to deep into the bush I continue to walk. At first I was so short of breath and the calf muscles twinged at any amount of elevation that I seriously wondered why I was doing it. But gradually I forgot about me and my unfit body and just spent the time in awe of the beauty around me. It may be over 35 years but the feeling of wonder when I see such natural beauty never leaves me. Gradually I began to notice I was walking freer, lungs full of clean air, swinging my arms like a joyful child and striding out full of purpose. I say good morning to anyone whom passes me by , I pat random dogs and yell out several general hello's to magpies, kangaroo families and other assorted wildlife. I have begun to look forward to my daily walks as I begin to feel a gentle peace embrace me and a muscle memory return of when I was strong and fit .
I have also had the pleasure of revisiting special places, searching for fairies with my grand-daughters, we actually saw a pink one and an orange one , magic I tell you. I have been walking these fairy tracks for over thirty years and it never disappoints. What better way to celebrate fairy sightings than to indulge in pancakes for lunch, being unbusy allows you these special moments and you sadly wonder why it took you so long to remember where the fairies were.
All roads and bush tracks always lead me here - I can sit here in silence just mesmerised by the sound of the waves gently lapping against the cliffs. I have also heard the fury and anger of the waves as they would crash and slam into the cliff face on a stormy night, one of my favourite sounds. The cliffs are beginning to fall down now after years of submission to the power of the sea.
These cliffs are called Devils Bluff but I call them Evie's cliffs, it is where she fell :( . I have sat on these rocks for hours on end staring out to sea, it is the most peaceful place I know and also one of the most beautiful. It is my soul.
In the glint of early morning sunshine I marvelled at this spiders web caught in the morning light on my walk. It was so intricate and clever and complete. All the little threads held together supporting each other making this safety net, making a little spider home. I am not usually a fan of spiders but this was something to stop and admire . All along the bush tracks nestled within the bracken and bush were so very many webs a whole community of clever spiders living unbusy lives just doing their thing everyday .I then felt bad for washing of their handiwork from my car mirror each day, they never looked that pretty , just annoying and messy .
It came to be on this glorious sunny Sunday , I found myself taking a moment to just lay down on the floorboards of the balcony, have a stretch and relax after my walk and stare at the beautiful blue sky. It was then I had this realisation - and it came as a surprise - I am happy, yes it even sounded strange to say it, but I do believe for the first time in what seems an eon I feel a calm happiness. Not a happiness from achievement, or ego, or wealth or owning materialistic things, but this strange quietness of unravelling to a calmness and of finally being unbusy , of breathing , of having time and of finding peace. Yes I am happy and that's OK.
I have been just laying down watching clouds and the sky a lot lately. I have no idea why I started to do this but it is quite calming and the perfect time to daydream. The pure blue of the sky is mesmerising and in truth a wonder to behold.
How lucky are we to see such a thing and have the time to just be.I like to think there is someone else in the world somewhere doing the same thing :) blue sky twinning :)
may you be surrounded by blue skies and big dreams
x x
Jan
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